People hate to be corrected, it is rampant out there. Thinking back on earlier parts of my life I have been very guilty of this method of existing. I would fight tooth and nail and find any way to claim that I had been correct on any number of topics. Sometimes someone would present me with a blatant example or fact which demonstrated that I was completely wrong, but I would persist and try to find a way that I was correct. It was really quite pathetic and I wish I had never behaved that way.
A few years ago a long time friend sent me a message and asked:
“Do you believe Joseph Smith actually lived polygamy?”
I have previously consumed many LDS apologetic materials and among these were the works of Brian Hales regarding Joseph Smith’s polygamy. Many times Hales explains why Joseph did not have sex with most of these wives. A few weeks prior to my friend’s question I had read an article about the topic claiming that Joseph had never consummated any marriages with anyone but Emma Smith. Something like this is what I thought my friend was referencing. It is a very common LDS practice to have reasons that Smith did not “actually live polygamy” meaning he did not have relations with his young teen brides and only had “dynastic sealings” with most of the women. My reply to my friend was:
“Probably but I believe the vast majority of the women he was sealed to never actually consummated anything. And I find the lack of documentation around polygamy annoying. … This is one of the most annoying issues and I have a hard time permanently landing on any solid conclusion.”
This started me to thinking and poking at the idea a little, even though I thought my friend may have been referencing consummation and not the entire doctrine of polygamy. At that point I had long come to believe that the “priesthood ban” against people of African descent was an act of Brigham Young and was not something God required or revealed. After this question from my friend, the thought occurred to me that maybe polygamy, or even just how it was understood and practiced in Utah, could fall into the same category. At the time of this question from my friend, I was busy fighting the new world order with memes and that was more of a focus than polygamy or history.
A couple of years later I was reading a high profile LDS apologist professor’s website, which I frequent, and he mentioned my friend and had many horrible things to say about this friend. I had to see for myself if what he was saying about my friend was true. I intended on figuring out where everything stood and setting my friend straight if need be. My biggest mistake in starting down this path was that I had lost my previous tooth and nail attitude. I had long since traded it for an honest seeker attitude, which I find much less stressful and more fun. I found that there is not much information available that would combat my friend’s foremost ideas. I was not as outraged as the professor by what I found my friend to be proposing. I also remembered that my friend had mentioned polygamy and I realized what he was asking years earlier. I figured that if I was to reclaim my friend I needed to know more. I set out with the intent of arming myself with information which would demonstrate the overwhelming case that Joseph Smith was a polygamist who was given word from God to bring the holy practice to the church. The idea that Utah polygamy might fit right in with the priesthood ban was banished from my mind. I focused on mastering all of the indisputable evidence. I went right to Brian Hales. There was a problem this time though. I started noticing dates and other details of claims which weren’t the strongest.
I also remembered that someone else had mentioned to me that Jacob 2:30 was a permanent prohibition on polygamy and not a loophole. I laughed the idea away easily the first time I heard it. But now, something told me that I should try to understand what was meant by that. I read the verse a couple of times over and could only see it my previous way. Curse my honesty, I decided to give it another try and this time each segment of the verse made much more sense with the view of prohibiting and not loopholing polygamy. Plain English and the rules of the language finally fit within the verse and I was fully convinced that this had never been a loophole for polygamy. That does not inherently mean that God did not tell Joseph to do it. So I set out to find proof that God had commanded Joseph to do it and how I would prove this to others without the aid of the powerful loophole. This led me to Section 132 and all I found in the section this time was error after error, and contradiction after contradiction. I started writing them down as I came across them in hopes of being able to resolve the issues with them. I had known that section 132 was added after Joseph died but I assumed it was much like some other sections which were known and held for years before publishing. The story of 132 is not very clean at all.
I went back and sent a message to my friend telling him some of my thoughts and some of what I was finding. I originally imagined this return to my friend would involve me presenting evidence which maybe he had not considered. But I had nothing. After this dud of an interaction with my friend, I had a few weeks of intense all day and night deep dives which led me to feel quite differently. I had never considered anything like what Joseph Smith III had claimed, that his father was innocent of polygamy. I had merely brushed any mentions of Emma Smith and RLDS claims aside as my team was obviously 100% correct about it all, so why look at the loser side? After these weeks I returned again to my friend in a much more subdued attitude after my fruitless quest for facts which would precipitate my friend’s return. I stated what I was starting to believe on the subject. Then my friend sent me a Fotheringham video. Fotheringham laid out some of the things I had been reading about and many more and he had gathered all the receipts and included them. I went and read his receipts and then some. At this point I have been reading and reviewing speeches, journals, court cases, memoirs, debates, podcasts, timelines, websites and anything else I can come across on the subject. My honest assessment is that I lean toward Smith not having done it. I do not fault anyone for leaning the other way. I think this topic is one which could reasonably be viewed either way. I do not think a person to be ridiculous for thinking Smith did it. On the other side of things I would like for the view that Smith did not do it to be viewed as acceptable. The case for it is much stronger than I would have ever imagined.
I have been in this mindset for years now and it was just fine for the first bit. However, recently many more people have adopted the same general view and this has brought the attention and ire of both those who love and those who hate the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Myself and those like me are viewed as the dumbest and most delusional idiots by both standard members and bitter enemies of the church.
There is no part of me that wishes that I had undertaken the endeavor differently though. I know that I have been honest and sincere in my efforts. First to try to find ways to convince my friend and then in ways to just know for myself. Looking at each source cited and separating interpretations and inferences from the actual facts has been massively eye-opening. Entirely different inferences can be just as possible, and many times much better, in explaining what happened historically. Each fact presented has a multiplicity of possible interpretations and there are so many angles to view things from. There are certain situations which can demonstrate which people in history were being dishonest and those are very helpful in finding better interpretations.
I care very little for what others negatively think of me and thus it does not bother me being viewed as an absolute moron. On the other hand I do care greatly when someone tries to understand the way that I see things. Even if we do not ultimately agree I appreciate an honest effort and consider an individual undertaking the task of trying to understand to be a friend of the Few & Far variety.
So just prepare yourself because I will have many posts in the future promoting my idiocy and mania.