There are thousands of things that have happened in the world of music that have made many a good man sick to his stomach. These are 10 of the most vile and abhorrent offenses against music and all that is good and right with the world.
10. We are the World
I wanted to be specific so I chose one prime example of a cheesy celebrity sing-a-long, but there are many more painful examples of this. Anytime there is a problem in the world there will always be a long list of sappy celebrities to sing a song about it and make everything worse.
9. Carl Lewis Starts a Human Chain
A wonderful treat straight out of the 80’s. An Olympic athlete tries to unite mankind with the power of song and an old woman blowing bubbles at him in the weight room. Hilariously bad and definitely a crime against music.
8. Perfect Turd Music
This is one of the stupidest songs ever written. It will make anyone who likes actual music want to vomit. Some whiney buttmunch complaining about his Daddy. To quote the great Beavis, “Awww, is Daddy’s little girl gonna cry?”
7. Robert Plant is In The Mood
Wow. That is all I can say as I watch and see how the mighty singer of Led Zeppelin has fallen. Another of the tremendous atrocities against music that we get from the 80’s, this one seems to hurt more than others.
6. Mariah Carey Tramps it up and Goes Crazy
She used to be that wholesome, very talented girl that anyone could respect. Then one day everything changed. Her voice seemed a lot less golden and she was nuts.
5. Coolio Rips Off Stevie Wonder Then Gets Upset With Weird Al
Coolio had a hit with “Gangsta’s Paradise” which was a rip off of Stevie Wonder’s “Pastime Paradise”. When Weird Al Yankovic did “Amish Paradise” Coolio was upset because he never gave permission. Coolio received royalties from the song, even though he stole it from Stevie Wonder.
4. Aerosmith Medley Featuring EVERYONE
Too many cooks in the kitchen. Unfortunately all that any of them know how to cook is reheated, day old macaroni and cheese.
3. Wish You Weren’t Durst
I wonder if he did this for the nookie. I would rather hear Gilbert Gottfried cover this song than to see it soiled in such a way.
2. St. Anger
This was the culmination of many years of Metallica not being Metallica. I cried when I realized they were gone for good. I could not believe that the same name that graced the cover of “Master of Puppets” was involved with this melee of pangy crap.
1. Jimmy Page Disgraces Kashmir
Not only were there horribly retarded lyrics involved but a really bad movie too. Why did Jimmy Page let Puff Daddy do this and not let Weird Al do a polka tribute to Zeppelin?
This list is by no means complete so feel free to let me know what I have missed.
I’m surprised Simple Plan wasn’t afraid of falling through the roof with such deep lyrics.
You forgot P Diddy covering Every Breath you Take. But A pretty well rounded list. Simple Plan [is awful]. All I have to say is someones daddy really hooked those boys up.