Before the Decade is Over

Some time ago, let’s say last August, I was called in to sign something at a doctors office.  Next to the signature was a space for the date.  I wrote 8/6/7 in the date space.  The woman who gave me the paper looked at it and then said, ” I think you have to put 8/6/07.”  I then asked, “Should I put 08/06/07 or 008/006/007 ?”

It will be nice when this decade is over and I will no longer face the persecution for not wanting to put a “0” in my abbreviation for the year.  A person should be able to abbreviate a date as far as they can without confusing others.  I saw an ad on TV the other day for the Olympics and it said to watch starting on 8/8/08.  I thought, “What a shame.  It would be cooler if they had 8/8/8.” My family had a reunion on July 7th last year and everyone kept saying that it was going to be on “seven, seven, o’seven”. I think by now it should be clear that I said, “seven, seven, seven”.

It is a strange phenomenon that people cannot mentally depart from placing 2 digits in the year column.  Most of anyones life who lives in a single digit decade and lives longer than 20 years will be lived in years with double digit abbreviations and this leads to peoples inability to drop a digit for ten years.  Most months are written numerically with one digit and people have no problem switching between one and 2 digits.  Once we hit the year column people feel a need to use 2 spaces.  In an effort to out-smart-alec me some of you may think, “What did you do in the year 2000?”  Don’t be stupid, I used “0”, as I needed to denote the year.

In this decade I have not found another person who is taking part with me in this “Decade-Crusade”.  I have found people who agree, but I have never found anyone else who marks the year column of dates without a leading “0”.  I only have another year and a half before this issue is irrelevant for 90 years.  I would like to find other individuals who feel as I do on the matter.  If we can stand up and be counted I bet, ironically, we will still be in the single digits.  So far the tally is “01”.

Creativity for the Untalented

I heard Dennis Miller say some time ago that Contrarianism is creativity for the untalented. This is a very thought provoking statement and the more I have thought about it the more true it becomes. If someone with no talent wants to create something, whether it is a painting, a poem, a news article or just anything that can be created they many times look at another persons work and say, “I am going to do the opposite”. Doing the opposite makes it look as though the person thought of it on their own, since no one else has done it before. Only the opposite has been done before. “Look at my painting. I call it the Lisa Mona and it has a man with a big smile in it.”

Continue reading “Creativity for the Untalented”

One Liners

These are some one liners I have come up with.

“Self esteem is overrated.”

“I laugh at Americas Funniest Home Videos, that’s how I know I am stupid.”

“The Chinese are very efficient since their fire drills are much quicker than ours.”

“My mailbox is now just a small trash can for the front of my house.”

“If something is an acquired taste, that means it sucks.”