10. No 3 month break
Your whole life teachers and schools have trained you that summer was a time to not be required to be anywhere and to take it easy. Well guess what, they lied.
9. Baseball
Basketball has just ended and football won’t start up until fall. You are out of luck unless you like to watch baseball or golf. Personally those are both a little slow for my 21st century American attention span. Every 4 years you get the summer Olympics but let’s be straightforward, watching an hour of TV to see a 10 second race is pretty brutal too. The Olympics are best watched as a highlight reel but by the time they come around I am so starved to see people moving fast I will watch them in all their commercial glory.
8. Reruns
Personally I only watch a couple of shows at a time. So all the stupid reality TV shows they show in summer to act like they are showing new material are just brutal and if I want to see a rerun of anything I will just go to Hulu or ABC and watch it on my own schedule. (Side note: Has anyone else noticed that reality TV shows are just Game Shows with special locations?)
7. Worse Sunburns
As a kid you got to hang out in the sun all day. But now that you are older and sit behind that desk all day, when the sun hits your skin you will begin to sizzle like a vampire. It will hurt more and seem to last longer too.
6. Your kids are at home getting into your stuff
While you are stuck at work your children are at home and they are breaking into all of your prize possessions and destroying them. They will ruin computers, TVs, guitars or anything else you want to keep in good condition. No matter how tightly you lock it up they will find a way to get into it.
5. It is hot but you rarely get to cool off
Trips to the pool were a daily occurrence for me as a young man. Now I am lucky to get out once a summer. Now if you do get to the pool you have to watch and make sure that your children don’t drown, so you can’t really enjoy the full experience.
4. Summer treats will give you diabetes
Ice cream, Slurpees and Big Gulps used to be a staple of summer enjoyment. Now in your older age you have suddenly become more concerned about health and diet. As a youngster you would run around and burn off anything you threw into your body but now that you sit around all day you will have serious consequences if you indulge in the old ways.
3. Gas prices get higher
Taking a road trip will kill your bank account. This is a recent development of course, as I remember gas in 1998 was $0.72 a gallon for a while. In summer gas prices always go up as more people take road trips and now a trip that used to cost 10 dollars will cost 45.
2. You’ve seen all the summer movies before
When you were a kid, didn’t it seem like there were a lot more movies that you were excited to see? Now all you see are remakes of old movies you used to like that aren’t quite as well done but have nicer graphics. And how many superhero movies can you watch in one summer anyway?
1. Summer just isn’t special anymore. It just isn’t
If you can use your old person brain to recall the wonderful feelings you had for summer as a child. They are dead and gone aren’t they? All of the aforementioned factors added together with the fact that time gets faster and faster every year you live makes summer seem much less significant than it used to. By the time I reach my 30’s those feelings of yesteryear will be completely forgotten.